Doomsday Seed Vault – Comedy Relief

Has anyone considered the idiotic comedy of having our planet’s ‘doomsday seed vault’ located in the Arctic?

Today the vault holds nearly a million seeds intended to be available should earth experience a catastrophic event leaving our planet decimated of organic life… Of course if that were the case, then any remaining soil would be contaminated, there would be ozone and pollution at levels that could not sustain life, and waterways would be minor streams filled with various contaminants.

So where are they planning to plant these seeds? And if they are all housed in the Arctic, how would someone get there? How would they transport the seeds back to an area supporting life? Where are the greenhouses? How will greenhouses function if there is no power? Who will tend the ‘seeds’?

The idea seems a bit comical when considering the events that would trigger the need.

The vault is located on an Arctic island where access is considered ‘secure’. It’s funding comes from the Norwegian government and the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation.   It claims to have ‘robust security systems’ in case anyone is thinking about looting their seeds.

To their credit, they adamantly state that no GMO seeds will be stored.

Lufthansa offers an expedited flight from Seattle to the Svalbard Airport, 49 hours, should Bill Gates need to make a quick getaway to grab some seeds. Of course he would still need to rent a boat to get to the island and once there, given there are no roads, transportation is via a snowmobile. All during massive global crisis…

So in a global crisis, hundreds of snowmobiles would trek across the terrain hauling seeds to waiting boats that would gruel through a raging ocean to Norway where planes would be waiting at the airport to evacuate the seeds all across the world – as the planet is dying…

But then they chose the island because for its balmy temperatures ranging from about -20’ to a high of 39’, not factoring wind and humidity which drop the ‘feels like’ 10 or more degrees.

Good intentions not withstanding, due to the cost of the structure, Norway has a law that provides artwork must be present and thus commissioned an artist who created a stunning light display on the face of the vault.

Just a little comedy relief for the day – Smile!

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